Phillip W. Martin
Today, we’re diving into a topic that has sparked some critical discussions among disciples—marriage and the book “Created to Be His Help Meet” by Debi Pearl. While this book ebbs and flows in popularity, a recent documentary explored concerns about toxic ideas and unhealthy dynamics in Christian marriages. So, let’s explore this together and discover how we can cultivate healthy, balanced relationships rooted in biblical truth.
Embracing Mutual Submission: A Dance of Love
Before we start, remember that marriage is a partnership of equals. The Bible paints a beautiful picture of mutual submission, where both spouses willingly and lovingly submit to one another out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21). It’s not about one person being subservient to the other; it’s about dancing together in harmony, valuing and respecting each other’s thoughts, feelings, and desires.
Unleashing Individuality: Celebrating God’s Masterpiece
God, in His infinite creativity, has made each of us uniquely. So why would we want to suppress that? The Scriptures remind us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). In marriage, both partners should be encouraged to embrace and develop their gifts, passions, and dreams. We bring richness and joy to our relationship by celebrating our distinctiveness.
Communicating with Love: Building Bridges, Not Walls
In any healthy marriage, communication is the lifeblood that keeps it thriving. Open and honest dialogue creates an atmosphere of trust and understanding. God encourages us to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15), sharing our thoughts and concerns with kindness and grace. By actively listening to one another, we can forge deeper connections and find solutions that honor and benefit both spouses.
Breaking Stereotypes: Partners in Purpose
Let’s debunk a myth together—men are not the only ones with leadership roles in marriage. There are distinct roles, but that doesn’t mean one person is superior. In God’s eyes, men and women are equally valued (Galatians 3:28). Each partner brings unique strengths, perspectives, and gifts. Together, as a united team, they can fulfill their shared purpose and build a strong foundation for their marriage.
Healing and Hope: Safe Spaces and God’s Justice
Now, this one is important. We cannot look the other way or endorse harmful advice regarding abusive relationships. God’s heart beats for justice, compassion, and protecting the vulnerable. The Bible urges us to seek justice and defend the oppressed (Isaiah 1:17). If you or someone you know is facing abuse, it is essential to seek safety, support, and professional help. God desires healing and restoration for all His children.
Friends, as followers of Christ, we are called to pursue marriages that reflect God’s love, grace, and truth. Let us break free from toxic ideas and instead embrace a liberating approach that fosters mutual submission, celebrates individuality, prioritizes open communication, challenges stereotypes, and champions justice and healing. By aligning our marriages with biblical principles, we can create thriving relationships that honor God and bring both partners joy, growth, and fulfillment.
Remember, love, is not meant to be a burden but a beautiful adventure. So, let’s embark on this journey together, walking in the freedom and joy God’s design holds for our marriages.
~PW 🌮🛶
Phillip W. Martin 
Leave a comment